Monday, June 13, 2005

Flash Fiction - 2

Memories

Mahesh could barely contain his anger as he saw Shalini inside the store with her husband and child. Standing outside and looking through the glass, he could see her laughing, playing with her son, picking out dresses, whispering in her husband's ear... all signs of a happy and contented wife and mother. And here he was, unable to forget her even after so many years.

This was the first time he was seeing her since learning that she had married someone else. He was still tormented by memories of their time together. He still had the tickets stubs from the movies they had seen, the restaurant bills from the meals they had shared, the greeting cards, the teddy bears, the photos... But here she was looking so happy beside someone else. Did she even love him then? Did she have any memories of him at all? Did she even remember him?

At that moment, Shalini's son yanked himself free himself from his father's hand and opened the door of the store. Her husband turned around and yelled "Mahesh! Don't go outside". Mahesh stood rooted to his spot as the kid ran back inside. He then turned around and started walking.

38 Comments:

At 4:19 PM, Anonymous ram said...

It was crisp yet delightfully sweet...much better than the keyboard crap you wrote a couple of weeks ago...

 
At 5:05 PM, Anonymous Balaji said...

nice one, balaji. reminds me of the movie autograph

 
At 5:07 PM, Anonymous GP said...

Balaji, good one.. reminded me of some movie I saw recently where the heroine names her child after her ex-lover.. and someone older advices against love, saying that you will alll do this after love failure.. so dont fall in love... Remember which movie?

 
At 5:17 PM, Blogger skanda said...

that's a beutiful one..which book was it from?..

 
At 5:19 PM, Blogger packer said...

waiting for your review of Ullam Ketkume!

 
At 5:47 PM, Anonymous GP said...

For a review of Ullam Ketkume, visit my blogs, guys..

 
At 6:36 PM, Blogger Balaji said...

thanx ram. inspite of the put-down of my earlier attempt :-)

balaji, thanx!

gp, not sure. but sathiyama enda padamum nyabagam illa when i wrote this.

skanda, no book. own stuff.

 
At 6:51 PM, Anonymous GP said...

Balaji, I believe you... My concern is I am also losing memory like Sujatha... thats why I am worried.. how can i forget? Pyramid Natarjan says to his son/daughter something like "Love failure-ku appuram lover-oda peyarai paiyanukko ponnukko vachu adhai kooppidumbodhu oru chinna santhoshappattukkitte vaazha poriya?"

Someone plz help me.. I cant sleep otherwise..

 
At 8:24 PM, Anonymous Prakash said...

Balaji, nice. Short and sweet.

GP, not sure which movie you are thinking about. If it helps any, I think there is something similar in 'Boys'. Didn't see the movie, but there were clips where Harini (aka Genelia) mentions that her father named her after his lover.

 
At 9:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

dreams

 
At 10:25 PM, Blogger Orange Fronkey said...

Vijay also says something similar about naming your kid your ex-lover's name in "Poove unakkaaga"

 
At 10:46 PM, Blogger Nithya Swaminathan said...

Lovely!:) Short and sweet..:)

 
At 11:20 PM, Anonymous ram said...

bj, was so disappointed with the earlier one, esp. being a fan of all your earlier works...i think u got back into that 'mode' now...how about a sequel to Friends?! :)

 
At 2:13 AM, Anonymous Talking Straight said...

Poetically, it might be great. But thinking of it realistically, what is the difference between this and cheating. If shalini ditched her lover and married this guy and living happily, why does she have to name their child as Mahesh? Doesn't this amount to cheating her husband now? What if her husband knows about this? You don't care for his feelings?

If she is living with her husband now and carrying feelings for her ex-lover, it is still called as 'cheating' (by thoughts) her husband in a relationship.

I dont know how you could glorify such things in the pretext of your story telling skills.

 
At 2:17 AM, Anonymous Talking Straight said...

How about a sequel to this? The husband getting his turn and naming their second kid in memory of his ex-lover. Will the wife agree to this is she comes to know it?

yennayaa kudumbam idhu?
All those examples of 'Autograph' and 'Boys' might sound good when you see them as movie dialogues. Nejathula naaridum !!!

 
At 7:22 AM, Blogger Anjali said...

a very good one

 
At 9:16 AM, Anonymous GP said...

Yeah.. Boys.. right.. thanks, Prakash.. Harini tells her father in the petrol bunk, right? My day is saved.. :-)

 
At 10:47 AM, Anonymous ram said...

"If she is living with her husband now and carrying feelings for her ex-lover, it is still called as 'cheating' (by thoughts) her husband in a relationship."

--> I dont want to project a holier-than-thou attitude here but I do think that while gestures like these dont exactly constitute cheating, mite open up old scars at some point in time...but as fiction (flash or automatic, I dont care!), I thought Bj's 'story' was nicely written...

the scene in Boys was well-written too...but am sure the Anita Ratnam character lambasted her hubby after they left the gas station!

 
At 11:12 AM, Blogger Balaji said...

talking, "thinking of it realistically". i think thats where the problem lies. fiction is just that. fictional characters in a fictional world. that was just a story about what someone did. there's no question of glorification of her actions or analysis of whether what she did was right.

 
At 11:24 AM, Anonymous ram said...

bj, while i agree with u about it being just a 'story,' i dont quite agree with the foll. comment of yours:

"there's no question of glorification of her actions or analysis of whether what she did was right."

we all have the tendency to get judgmental about the morality of characters and their motivations...I think thats an inescapable part of fiction too, be it movies or stories...

but as i commented earlier, i thought the story was crisp and finely written...whether she did was right/wrong, is upto the reader to decide...you shouldnt worry too much about that as long as they like the story!! :)

 
At 12:43 PM, Blogger Balaji said...

ram, i agree that we do get judgemental about stories/movies. my comment was just about the story itself. i did not glorify her act or analyze it in the story. It was a statement rather than an analysis. Personally, I do have opinions on it but I'm hoping that didnt come through in the story.

 
At 7:11 PM, Blogger Prabz said...

huh.. thatz cute.. but come on... not an excuse!! :)

 
At 5:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah I think that's its a very Tamil or maybe Indian thing to do. Get sooo nostalgic about past lovers etc. then name kids after them and keep movie tickets, and restaurant bills etc.

 
At 4:31 AM, Anonymous rekhs said...

hey how do u guys conclude the husb did not know..mayb she did tell him..how abt that angle???
:)

 
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At 10:45 PM, Anonymous Sean Cody said...

Hey there Mate, Thanks for sharing your point of view.
Clearly you have put a lot of thought to the topic, it's appreicated.

Have a great one.
Sean Cody

 
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At 8:06 PM, Blogger Aravind said...

Balaji,

Nothing against anyone, I still feel that Shalini should have married Mahesh, Is there a valid reason behind why Shalini married another man, Yes there could definetley be a valid reason but the pain of love can never be forgotten. And both of them might not be living happily. Shalini must have got the braveness to come out and join Mahesh's hands for marriage.

 
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